Backup of Rubicon/40 (2) Back

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#navi(Rubicon)
文字入りの画像に無理矢理日本語を入れるのは無理があるから、思い切って別の写真入れた。by Logue
*We Dream You

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何を言ってるんだ？私は。ナイフと脚についてか？

そうだ。それだけだ。思ってるように現実のものではないナイフ。地獄、その脚は現実のものではない。そうやって、自分で自分をごまかすだけの便利な逃避である。

もう、三日三晩走り続けている。どこから始まったか、そしてどこで終わるか、自分がはじめに言った場所からだろうか。時にはカメラ、時には警官。そして、自分が本当にやったのではないかという恐怖。

意味を持つ路地を見つけた。その後ろのマンホール。閉まっていようが溶接されていようがたいした問題ではない。自分は、その後下水道を通って再び三日間走り続けている。

無という感覚。自分は走るべきでもなければ追われるべきでもない。救世主であるべきでもない。救世主であることは気力を与えるが、それと同時に死への恐怖をも与える。They'll say that things this bizarre don't make sense, reason doesn't apply, and that the world is not a logical place.  I think the problem is not that the world isn't logical, but that we don't understand logic as well as we thought.  How can you possibly understand logic?  With logic?  You can't see the eye you see with.  Or so they say.
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$C5


Kate and I had been friends forever.  Almost since before we were born.  She was the kind of girl that we only see in movies ﾐ beautiful, intense, the embodiment of grace, passion, and will.  The kind you shouldn't stand a chance with, but end up pretending that you do.  Why she liked with me, I still don't know.  Why she at one point loved me, I don't think I'll ever know.  I don't know what she wanted, and how I could possibly have had even some of it.
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$C5


The memories I still can piece together are good ones, at least in the beginning.  So many hours at the lab the table and the computer and the walls and ceiling all blended together.  It was the time of my life.  My conscious mind was so shot from sleep-deprivation and caffeine I couldn't see the screen as I typed.  That's why the Wheeling Hubcap Factory higher-ups liked me.  The most frantic of the monkeys, with an infinite number of typewriters all to myself.  I didn't know what I was creating.  I didn't know why.  And I didn't care, because I was in heaven.  Or hell, it didn't matter.
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